MAN CRUSH

    I would like to point out this unusual man crush I have. I say unusual because when you normally hear the term man crush, it is a hetrosexual man who admires another man in a in an nonsexual manner.  But in this case normal man crush rules do not apply. Why not? You might ask, well I will tell you.
   My man crush is none other then the beautiful Drew Berrymore. I've known about this woman for pretty much my whole life. I mean who really hasn't grown up with the Berrymores in some way or another, I mean c'mon they're true Hollywood royalty.
   Now I love Drew because well she had longevity in her career. She started acting when she was a young girl. The earliest  film I remember watching was E.T. were she played the younger sister of the main character. Fast forward a couple of years she is in rehab for substance abuse, being known not for acting credits but for being a complete train wreak that can't get right. Flashing David Letterman live on national television. She even has the cloud hanging over her head that she did pornography, allegedly of course; but still is  debated about to this very day.
    If you been living under a rock. Let me tell you she is no longer the same woman mentioned in the previous paragraph. She holds many titles and each one is more respectable than the last.
   To top it all off I'll mention it again. LONGEVITY!!! Drew has had to become more then just an actress over the years. Which if you don't remember that was hard because she was the original child star train wreak. Now this woman is a wife, mother, and buisness woman, along with being Hollywood royalty.
 

Letter From My Inner Asshole Child

Dear Shawn

   So you just finished a 18 month film degree. Then you were stupid enough to go back for a Bachelor degree in Entertainment Business directly after that. To make things worse you are a complete slacker who turns in your homework late if you turn it in at all. So this is your self intervention. And no it’s not crazy for you to do this, no matter what other people say. So just tell those voices in your head to shove it.

    First things first can you stop being a slacker. Believe it or not it hurts you much more then you think. Every time you do something half ass, it ends up making me feel bad. You are capable of so much with your life, but you let your ADDHD (Yes it’s a real thing.) get in the way. SO STOP IT JACK ASS.

    Now let’s talk about those things you want accomplish in life. You the whole want to be this this and that stuff.  You need to start writing and film more things. I know you get tired of trying to outline all of the screen plays and failed novel ideas. News flash when the hell did you ever actually outline something when you wrote in your younger years you never did that. You would freestyle write and come up with the weirdest, awesome, stories that are worth money in your business endeavors today. You remember Second Sight you wrote and then threw away. Get back on that boy.

   Another thing you need to work on is your health. The extra weight you are carrying around on your body is really dangerous. You have a family history of Diabetes. If you keep this up you are going to have it, along with a missing foot and a not so sexy Hover Round, because your gonna be too fat to walk on a prosthetic leg. Plus you know you want to dress better, and it’s hard to buy a suit for someone as short as you, and someone as round as you are.

    Speaking of dressing better you need to start dressing better. It’s Kind of embarrassing that you don’t have many grown man clothes. You talk about being grown man sexy well can you dress like a grown man one in a while. Every time we have a class presentation you’re the only person wearing a shirt with some sort of graphic on the front, or even the back of the shirt. You can’t look grown man sexy with a purple Daniel Bryan shirt on. His catch phrase is “Yes, Yes, Yes”, your walking around with a damn orgasm on your damn chest. Trust me it’s not as sexy as it sounds.

   Now I bet you feel like crap after this whole letter. I would say sorry, but c’mon you know it’s not true. I’m glad you feel like crap; so now you can get off your ass and actually do something abut your short coming.

 

                                                                             Sadly You’re Inner Child

                                                                                    Shawn Luster   

30 BEFORE 30

   

    So I'm going to turn 25 years old. Now for a lot of you that might seem like a whatever thing. But for me that is not that, mainly because most people at this age are already working towards some career they want. While I finished a film degree and and working on a bachelors degree, and completely vague idea of what I want to do with the rest of forever. So believe it or not I made a list of thirty things to accomplish before the age of thirty years old. A list compiled of both personal and professional goals, and travel destinations that are not in any particular order because I first wrote this list down bye hand trying to keep the list to actually thing that can be accomplished. But some really stupid or crazy ideas may have slipped by with out my knowledge. 

1. To take a woman out on a proper date. : This is something that I wrote down because in all my near 25 years of life I have not taken any woman out on a REAL date we she knows I have romantic intentions or the other way around.

2. Write at least one book. : Yeah this is a goal I had ever since I was a kid reading Goosebumps, Sounder, or other books that I read often. 

3. Lose wight and keep the weight off. : This is mainly for health reasons, my family has a history  of diabetes; I want to live till I'm one 100 years old,and keep my foot while doing it. 

4. Learn to sail the seven seas. : Okay when I was in the navy I loved it when we did traveled, and wanted to get a house-boat. But the sad thing is house-boats are not actually made to go out over the seven seas.

5. Make a real film. : Yeah I have to put my film degree to good use some how.

6. Learn to surf. : I want to surf and be able to take pictures of others surfing simple as that.

7. Visit and tour around Hawaii. : There are many things that I wanna see and do all over Hawaii.

8. Relearn Sign Language. : When I was younger I had a crush on a preachers daughter who just so happened to be deaf. I learned sign language to talk to her. 

9. Visit and tour around Australia. : Same as Hawaii.

10. Relearn to speak spanish. : My mother is kind of disappointed that I don't know spanish any more. Every time she talks to me in spanish I give her a blank, cold, lifeless exprisian until she repeats what she said in english.

11. Kiss someone in the rain. : What can I say I'm a hopeless romantic.

12. Visit and tour around Europe. : Same as other travel destinations.

13. Sail on the open seven seas : Yeah I just want to live and travel on a boat.

14. Learn how to play an instrument. : Yeah I also always wanted to learn how to play guatir when I was in my teens but that didn't work out, but still wanna play an instrument.

15. Finally go to comic-con at least one year. : I'm never been to Comic-con. Do you know what it's like to be a nerd that's never been there. I'm the laughing stock of the nerd community.

16. Find out how to Cosplay. : I just want to dress up as Jason Todd or even Aqualad.

17. Go to a musical for the first time. : I never really been to a musical but want to go. I mean many that can be a date idea.

18. Cook a fancy meal for a fancy lady. : I love to cook and for some reason I just want to cook for that special someone.

19. Start dressing grown man sexy. : So I actually like to dress up but don't have anything to dress up for.

20. Pay all my student loans. : I really hate being in debt.

21. Give important lecture about something important. : I really don't mind public speaking. I can remember when I was in high school giving bible studies.

22. Give an awesome worthy toast. : I'm guessing this goes with the public speaking.

23. Help out with an actual charity. : Yeah this is mainly for me. If I accomplish it you will never know.

24. Go on a cross country road trip. :

25. Create a dating method. : I have been single for the past four going on five years.

26. Make a really awesome web series. : Again gotta put my film degree to work some how.

27. Ride a roller coaster. : Yeah I acomplished this on DEC 12, 2013.

28. Take a trip to Rio. : Same as Hawaii.

29. Learn to laugh more. : Dude apparently I need to.

30. Let's try to help others accomplish they're goals or thirty before thirties. : Yeah I kind meet and help other people who also have goals to reach before they turn thirty.

ROMANTIC COMEDIES FOR HIM AND HER

Okay so I just recently watched an awesome film that I thought was going to be a romantic comedy. I mean it was a pretty fair assumption the way it was pushed to the audiences. Well let's not keep you in the dark on what I seen; it was ABOUT TIME. Yeah I love a good Rom-Com from time to time and I'm not ashamed of it. And I will tell you why.

  When people hear the the term Rom-Com they think something crazy or stupid like a Nicholas Sparks film. Now that is just the wrong way to look at it... Mainly because you just imagined the wrong genre of film. Nicholas Sparks is straight up "Lady Mind Porn", while Rom-Coms are appealing to both men and women. But even though both genders are generally the target audience, you may notice that the plot of the film you watch in this genre are extremely different if you have a man or women in the protagonist seat. At which you are starting to think that I'm rambling nonsense; please stay with me and you will see what I'm talking about.

ROM-COMS FOR THE COUPLE

  Yes this is the kind of movie you are thinking of when you are  thinking Rom-Com. The two main leads are  heterosexuals while as far as the story goes. They either do a meet cute in the movie or just already know each other because of a mutual hatred for each other. Yeah it doesn't really matter  what happens during the movie, mainly because these movies follow the MET-CUTE formula. The two met, they get to know each other,  the misunderstanding happen, misunderstanding  tends to get resolved and they live happily ever after.  

SIDE NOTE: MANY WOULD COMPLAIN THAT I PUT ROMANCE COMEDIES WERE THE TWO LOVE INTEREST ARE HOMOSEXUALS. MY RESPONSE TO THAT; IN REAL LIFE HOMOSEXUALS TRY THER'RE HARDEST TO MODLE THE HOMOSEXUAL LIFE STYLE AFTER THE HETRO LIFE STYLE SO I PUT THEM IN THIS CATEGORY AS WELL.

  

ROM-COMS FOR HER

   Okay now let's talk about the women centered film. Rom-Coms for her, or as I like to call them "MODERN FAIRY TALES or LADY MIND PORN". Now these are the films that women like because they see them selves in the main character. 

  Now these films more times then not will have a woman as a main Protagonist. She can either be a complete screw up or a tough independent woman who is over worked and under played. Yeah the key  to these movies are the main character goes through very little character development if any. Oh, and there is also a wedding in the film, you gotta be careful because the wedding can be implied and not shown. But if they do show a wedding it will either be at the beginning or end, and if not the whole film is about a wedding. See below for examples.

ROM-COMS FOR HIM

   Great now we get to the him portion of this blog. Most romantic movies with a male lead try not to use the word romantic in it's description, mainly for the benefits of the male actors in these movies. Trust me you never wanna be type cast as the face for "Lady Mind Porn", you can even ask Matthew McConaughey he will tell you the same thing.

  The best examples of these films would have to be Scott Pilgram V.S. The World. If you read the books or watched the movie you know scott learns a few lessons by the end. That is not by mistake, in society or more western society we have a tendency to demand much more from men then we do women. I mean yes I get that women have equal rights to men. But men have the daunting task of "becoming", while women have a choice in the matter. Men just have to "become" always growing and always learning and rarely getting help along the way. That's something the Rom-Com protagonist have over real men they get the mentor or the funny sidekick to help or even do things for them.

  

   Well that is it for this weeks installment. Next week I will elaborate more on the DAMSEL CAUSING DISTRESS along with the more recognizable DAMSEL IN DISTRESS. Until then just take this with a grain of salt. Also don't forget the most important part.

HAVE FUN AND ENJOY LIFE!!!!

FAQ's

 1. The purpose of my blog is to open up a dialogue between people. You see now a days every person is a critic, but all they talk about is everything they hate. It get's really draining being surrounded  by all the negativity and crap we surround ourselves with every. I hope to break that boring mold of this vain trend and open up peoples' minds to forming their own opinions about things with out being judged for what they do or don't like.

2. The people who will benefit most from a blog like mine are those who enjoy movies. Now I plan to make even the casual movie goer into a complete Cinephile. Because everything is better when your a Cinephile.

3. Well blogging is actually a clever way for a person to get his or her name out. Now that can be a good thing or a bad. For example motivational speakers stay in touch with the followers to create a closer connection with them, and that is how they sell stuff to them.

WELCOME

 Welcome to my little corner of the internet. This is an honest space dedicated to my ever expanding interests. Now I have  different rules for each area I'm interested in so I surest you just sit back and enjoy the ride while I tell you how thing around hear work.

 MOVIE REVIEW

 I have this huge habit on critiquing movies and giving them a scoring. Now at first glance it would just seem a film grad who lives with his mother in the basement talking crap about films he sees. 

Well I would have you know that I have my own apartment; thank you very much. And I try not to talk complete trash about the movies I have watch in theaters. So I came up with my own method on how to score movies.

1. HAVE AN IDEA WHAT YOU ARE ABOUT TO WATCH: This is by far the most important to of all the rules, because how the hell do you expect to know if you are going to like the movie if you don't know what the story is about.

2. IF THERE IS MORE THEN ONE MOVIE IN A PARTICULAR FRANCHISE YOU COUNT ALL THE MOVIES AS ONE MOVIE AS ONE MOVIE: Now this is a traecky to do manly because some film franchises have too many  installments to them, like any movie about James Bond.

3. WHIEGH THE PROS AND CONS TO THE MOVIE: I have this three strike method that is more forgiving then most other critics. For every significant con a movie has I try to find redeeming qualities or traits to cancel out each con to a movie. (I.E. Man of Steel three cons being poor casting, weak antagonist, swell as a complete worthless fight sequence with the primary villain in the movie.)

MOVIE RECOMMENDATIONS

So this is a very simple thing I do that I notice most critic stopped doing, that is recommend you to movies you will like or be pleasantly surprised by. Now I will always give you a brief run down on the rating of the film and what the film is about.

MY THOUGHTS/EDITORIALS

 Okay so you might get a lot of these from me. Now I this is pretty much a wild card section. What ever I can get away with or go over I will do just that. So the best description for this category is that I can do anything and talk about anything like Anime, Urbane legends that I scare myself silly with, or even just me talking about monsters from out of the old monster stories we heard or never heard of as a kid.